Unholy. Barring injury, USC cannot be stopped in the passing game unless you have two lockdown corners and at least one defensive lineman bent on murdering Matt Barkley. No one in the entire nation has this, much less anyone in the Pac-12, so the best you might hope for is a weird road game, a team known for wearing a chip on its shoulder well, and a pesky offense capable of holding the ball that gets the kind of oddball breaks that happen in home games played against road favorites. That still sounds like Utah, and that still makes this the most interesting game on USC’s schedule NOT involving a team named after waterfowl.

Verily. Let it be known, though: USC’s offense reeks of brimstone, rocket fuel, and perdition, a Luciferian collection of isolation plays for wideouts, jerk routes, and run plays all run with Lane Kiffin’s special touch of extra-skillful dickery. If you are not playing them, it is a mean joy to watch, especially if it is Kiffin carving up former rival coach and co-worker Norm Chow across the field.

Oh, but Lane Kiffin’s nice now. Shut the hell up. No he’s not, and will never be nice. He is just quiet, and plays in a town that doesn’t care enough about other teams to publish inflammatory quotes to rile up other fanbases. You know what Lane Kiffin gets to do? Coach the next three years against Jim Mora. He has no reason to be nice, lenient, or intimidated by anything in his vicinity.

Watch him call plays. There is nothing nice whatsoever about it and will not be for the foreseeable future.

Spencer Hall at SBNation. There is nothing that scares me quite so much on USC’s schedule as a trip to Salt Lake City this season, because that’s where Robert Woods’ hammy probably goes boom or something equally fluky and stupid because we’re not playing in Corvallis this year.

The Alphabetical, Week 1: Alabama, Again - SBNation.com

  • Sep 5
  • 5
  1. bmichael said: I like this guy’s writing, even though I don’t understand anything he’s talking about.
  2. thethirdshift posted this

Fixed. theme by Andrew McCarthy