So the answer to the question “Is there an Oreo I won’t eat?” is now yes.
I subscribe to the Lewis Black theory that the candy makers somehow manage to recycle candy corn every year, as if there is a filter in the sewers and landfills that routes it all back to Candy Central where it is washed and redistributed.
(via Gawker)

So the answer to the question “Is there an Oreo I won’t eat?” is now yes.

I subscribe to the Lewis Black theory that the candy makers somehow manage to recycle candy corn every year, as if there is a filter in the sewers and landfills that routes it all back to Candy Central where it is washed and redistributed.

(via Gawker)

I…I…oh, Notre Dame fans, even you don’t deserve this kind of uniform FAIL. Just bring the kelly green back and everything will be okay.
(It gets worse when you look at the entire gallery of the uniforms for the Irish’s game against the Miami Hurricanes. When it comes to uniform design, Adidas is basically trying to rip off Nike and doing it very, very poorly.)

I…I…oh, Notre Dame fans, even you don’t deserve this kind of uniform FAIL. Just bring the kelly green back and everything will be okay.

(It gets worse when you look at the entire gallery of the uniforms for the Irish’s game against the Miami Hurricanes. When it comes to uniform design, Adidas is basically trying to rip off Nike and doing it very, very poorly.)

Um, Nike, maybe you might want to re-think selling this shirt.
(via From a Left Wing)

Um, Nike, maybe you might want to re-think selling this shirt.

(via From a Left Wing)

You know, there may have been thought at the time that he could be part time. It was not part time. The Olympics was in a shambles. There was corruption. There was - the International Olympic Committee was going to pull the Olympics from the United States of America which would have been a huge embarrassment. Because of Mitt Romney’s leadership skills he was called on to do it. He took a leave of absence and, in fact, Candy, he ended up not going back at all and retired retroactively to February of 1999 as a result.

Romney flack Ed Gillespie on CNN’s State of the Union, providing me with the biggest belly laugh of the weekend with the phrase “retired retroactively” on the probable Republican presidential nominee’s departure from Bain Capital.

Tell ya what. I’m gonna go cheat on my girlfriend and then say we broke up retroactively about, oh, two weeks ago. That should work. How about retroactively filing my taxes? I bet the IRS would buy that one.

apparently Metro wants to re-model L.A.’s Union Station.

This is what the historic station looks like and has looked like every time I’ve been inside and through it.

Now this is what the winning architectural firm has proposed to change it to:

And here is my reaction to reading about this in Gizmodo:

L.A.: you are why we can’t have nice things.

thedailywhat:

Marketing Campaign of the Day: As if it weren’t enough that North Carolina already doesn’t recognize same-sex unions, the state votes next Tuesday on a ballot measure that reads: “Constitutional amendment to provide that marriage between one man and one woman is the only domestic legal union that shall be valid or recognized by this State.”
This ad campaign, by Winston-Salem agency The Variable, plays on segregation-era discrimination to shock voters into voting down the offensive legislation, called Amendment 1: “On May 8th, make history. Don’t repeat it.”
Yes, please.
[adsoftheworld]

And this is the type of campaign that makes some people spit blood.
Listen, I understand the metaphorical value of comparing discrimination of gay people today to black people under Jim Crow laws — even though black people were supposed to be equal under the law, states put laws in place that did everything but allow that. I get it.
I fully support marriage equality and think what N.C.’s doing is repulsive — BUT IT’S NOT LIKE YOU ACTUALLY HAD TO USE SEPARATE RESTROOMS OR DRINKING FOUNTAINS. YOU COULD HIDE BEING GAY. IT WAS FUCKING AWFUL AND NOT ANYTHING ANYONE SHOULD GO THROUGH, BUT YOU COULD PASS THROUGH SOCIETY BEING GAY OR LESBIAN. YOU COULDN’T HIDE BEING BLACK. YOU COULDN’T HIDE THE THING THAT MADE WHITE PEOPLE FORCE YOU OUT OF RESTAURANTS, HOTEL ROOMS, AND SHUNTED OFF BY REALTORS WHO WOULDN’T SELL A HOME TO YOU IN A CERTAIN NEIGHBORHOOD. YOU CAN’T FUCKING HIDE THE SKIN COLOR THAT DROVE WHITE MEN TO PUT ALL SORT OF ONEROUS GRANDFATHER CLAUSES, POLL TAXES, AND LITERACY TESTS IN PLACE TO DENY YOU A RIGHT TO VOTE.
Was there a black person working on this ad campaign at all? Because I understand the point they’re trying to make — it’s just clumsily done and with no respect to what my family members and many others actually went through decades ago.
(P.S. never mind that there could be a sizable number of people who really do agree with the image above and want to see it put in place.)

thedailywhat:

Marketing Campaign of the Day: As if it weren’t enough that North Carolina already doesn’t recognize same-sex unions, the state votes next Tuesday on a ballot measure that reads: “Constitutional amendment to provide that marriage between one man and one woman is the only domestic legal union that shall be valid or recognized by this State.”

This ad campaign, by Winston-Salem agency The Variable, plays on segregation-era discrimination to shock voters into voting down the offensive legislation, called Amendment 1: “On May 8th, make history. Don’t repeat it.”

Yes, please.

[adsoftheworld]

And this is the type of campaign that makes some people spit blood.

Listen, I understand the metaphorical value of comparing discrimination of gay people today to black people under Jim Crow laws — even though black people were supposed to be equal under the law, states put laws in place that did everything but allow that. I get it.

I fully support marriage equality and think what N.C.’s doing is repulsive — BUT IT’S NOT LIKE YOU ACTUALLY HAD TO USE SEPARATE RESTROOMS OR DRINKING FOUNTAINS. YOU COULD HIDE BEING GAY. IT WAS FUCKING AWFUL AND NOT ANYTHING ANYONE SHOULD GO THROUGH, BUT YOU COULD PASS THROUGH SOCIETY BEING GAY OR LESBIAN. YOU COULDN’T HIDE BEING BLACK. YOU COULDN’T HIDE THE THING THAT MADE WHITE PEOPLE FORCE YOU OUT OF RESTAURANTS, HOTEL ROOMS, AND SHUNTED OFF BY REALTORS WHO WOULDN’T SELL A HOME TO YOU IN A CERTAIN NEIGHBORHOOD. YOU CAN’T FUCKING HIDE THE SKIN COLOR THAT DROVE WHITE MEN TO PUT ALL SORT OF ONEROUS GRANDFATHER CLAUSES, POLL TAXES, AND LITERACY TESTS IN PLACE TO DENY YOU A RIGHT TO VOTE.

Was there a black person working on this ad campaign at all? Because I understand the point they’re trying to make — it’s just clumsily done and with no respect to what my family members and many others actually went through decades ago.

(P.S. never mind that there could be a sizable number of people who really do agree with the image above and want to see it put in place.)

Do click through because this gets even better with the text you get when you hover over the image, as all xkcd comics do.
(via xkcd)

Do click through because this gets even better with the text you get when you hover over the image, as all xkcd comics do.

(via xkcd)

Hamilton Nolan reminds us every year why this event is loathsome. Stephen Colbert’s performance a few years back exposed the dinner perfectly for what it was and it’s good for writers to remind us why this is the antithesis of everything a free press should stand for.

I watched last night’s premiere in a crowded theater. Everyone booed this sport coat, with damn good reason. It’s like douche coloring, the equivalent of Ed Hardy or Affliction in our time.
(Also, if you hadn’t noticed already, Mondays are official “Mad Men Appreciation Days” here at The Third Shift, just like Wednesdays are “Justified Appreciation Days.” If you have a problem, I can’t help you.)

I watched last night’s premiere in a crowded theater. Everyone booed this sport coat, with damn good reason. It’s like douche coloring, the equivalent of Ed Hardy or Affliction in our time.

(Also, if you hadn’t noticed already, Mondays are official “Mad Men Appreciation Days” here at The Third Shift, just like Wednesdays are “Justified Appreciation Days.” If you have a problem, I can’t help you.)

Ahem. (clears throat)

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Nope. Not done…just breathing….

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

You passed on Leach and didn’t offer Kevin Sumlin for Mora the Younger, who’s barely been a college coach ever?

Yeah, still not done.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Rose Bowl? You’re talking about Rose Bowl? I just hope you can win a game!

UCLA’s athletics department is stuck in a time warp. The schadenfreude is wonderful but at some point, incompetence is going to take the fun out of this rivalry and replace it with pity. I mean, poor facilities on campus, a stadium halfway across town, an inability to even acknowledge the changing landscape of college football (and you can’t blame the UC system for this, cuz Berkeley gets it and is in the process of massive renovations to Memorial Stadium). It’s all really sad to think Karl Dorrell was a high point here. But yeah, still hilarious.

The ragesplosions at Bruins Nation are going to be epic.

I’m going to have to call BS on Peter Orszag, the former director of the OMB here, who is proposing that certain economic policies be left to un-elected commissions because polarization in D.C. is too high.

There are a couple of simple fixes in the Senate that would help: eliminate the filibuster and anonymous holds on any sort of nominee. If a senator wants to place a hold, he or she must attach their name to it and explain why, and it cannot be permanent. Appointing board members to commissions is inherently a political process — just look at how we nominate Cabinet officials and judges!

Besides, I grow tired of this “polarization is bad!” nonsense. The real problem with polarization is the half-truths and outright lies sprinkled throughout the various forms of media. Polarization in and of itself is a good thing, and here’s why: people believe in fundamentally different things when it comes to systems of government and how it should operate. Pleas for artificial compromise come from media and elites who aren’t really affected by the policies our politicians advocate; they merely want comity and the cash to keep funneling into the high-end donors’ pockets.

We have too little democracy in the sense that the House of Representatives is artificially capped at 435 members and it requires millions of dollars to run for federal office. More democracy and transparency, Mr. Orszag, not less.

These gentlemen have a serious case of the dumbass.

Kyle Orton ain’t the problem with Denver right now. It’s both the O and D lines. Not that I’m a Tim Tebow loather, but I wonder sometimes if fans who believe Tebow gives the Broncos the best chance to win are watching the same game I am.

seanfennessey:

Pants.

I…I just…no. NOTHING HE’S WEARING GOES WITH ANYTHING ELSE. Did you run this by LaLa before you left the house? And even if you did, hire a goddamn stylist to get the basics together.
Ladies and gentlemen, it is a crime to let your partners walk out of the house looking like this. Someone has to step in and say “NO.”

seanfennessey:

Pants.

I…I just…no. NOTHING HE’S WEARING GOES WITH ANYTHING ELSE. Did you run this by LaLa before you left the house? And even if you did, hire a goddamn stylist to get the basics together.

Ladies and gentlemen, it is a crime to let your partners walk out of the house looking like this. Someone has to step in and say “NO.”

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The Third Shift A vagabond who's made his home in the Pacific Northwest.

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